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The censustakers

Nah, She Won't Shoot

Updated: Aug 7, 2021


TAMPA, Fla.--I was a census taker in the sticks outside of Tampa. I walked up to a single-wide trailer to speak to the woman in the front yard. I identified myself, and she shrilly demanded I shouldn't ask those questions.


A moment later, a relaxed guy walks around the side of the trailer, tells her to go inside, and he answers all of my questions. Meanwhile, shrill lady gets more shrill, yelling at him that it's dangerous to answer me, that no one has the right to know how many people live here. Close to the finish, she yells at me, "You leave my property RIGHT NOW, or I'm opening fire! I WILL shoot you!"


Mellow guy has the same relaxed smile he's had through the entire episode. I asked him, "Is she really going to shoot me?" " Nah, she won't actually shoot you."


He had way more confidence than I did in either her forbearance, her poor aim, or the lock he had on the family rifle. But I wrapped up the interview, thanked him, and left without a shot fired.


--David Strobel, Hudson, Fla.






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